Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
