oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
we made out on top of his cat.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
