he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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