I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
