You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
