So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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