There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
