Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
