So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Randomize
