I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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