dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
