You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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