i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
