he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Randomize