I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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