Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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