someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
