we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
