Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
