I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
