wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
