shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
