Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
oh god the rape fog is back!
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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