He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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