Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
