My friends, they love my intelligence
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
