I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Text me some of your sweat
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize