Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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