all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
