Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
