spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
