If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I wish my penis had an off switch
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
