Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
