I wanna bring you to show and tell
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Everclear isn't food dammit
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize