i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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