laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize