He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
