Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry whiskey6 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(404): View more from Georgia

Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head

(770): View more from Georgia

Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you

Fav 20 4202 823
share tweet
(620): View more from Kansas

It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"

Fav 21 1901 5944
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(732): View more from New Jersey

I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen

Fav 25 2859 11550
share tweet
(918): View more from Oklahoma

I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.

Fav 27 4162 2340
share tweet
(603): View more from New Hampshire

He sprained his penis one time

(603): View more from New Hampshire

He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis

Fav 21 869 2506
share tweet
(303): View more from Colorado

The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage

Fav 8 2772 1363
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(423): View more from Tennessee

NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.

Fav 2 1393 691
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(828): View more from North Carolina

Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.

Fav 1 164 29
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(352): View more from Florida

Ok so I need a recap of last night...

(813): View more from Florida

YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that

Fav 0 63 10
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT