a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I cannot find my penis.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Randomize
