I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
