I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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