Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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