i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
