So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Randomize
