U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
