i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
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