pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize