you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
