they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
