Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
