my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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